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Post by vaconcovat on May 31, 2010 6:48:03 GMT
Again, re-posting for the sake of backing up, and i would like some Criticism on my writing and the story please. And try to avoid the mathematical impracticalities of infinity please... *Glares at Veers* rosasecta.com/*2747I am posting a rosa link because proboards apparently can claim ownership of anything posted on their forums. |
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Post by FoxtrotZero on May 31, 2010 7:11:22 GMT
So far, not getting much to anything. I don't much like stories when they start off... elusive like this.
(T)
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Post by Vertigo on May 31, 2010 7:24:01 GMT
I'll read this later when I'm not prone to mess up the words every sentence.
Also, I'll be breaking it down into categories I'll be grading. That's right, fear me..
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Post by microfarad on May 31, 2010 20:48:16 GMT
The mechanics are kinda screwed up... I don't understand what this machine does...
(T)
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Post by Qwerty on Jun 1, 2010 20:04:19 GMT
It simply works as a method of transport between places.
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Post by vaconcovat on Jun 1, 2010 21:53:10 GMT
In short, the infinity machine generates a infinite amount of matter somewhere...
And THE SPHERE simply works of a matter of teleportation to anywhere inside that infinitum.
The story is based around a faulty AI inside the infinitum that 'gathers engineers' for 'infinity maintenance'. SCIM, or Specialised Computing of Infinity Maintenance, is that AI. It has control over all the engineers' spheres, so it has total control over everyone inside it.
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Post by Elmach on Jun 2, 2010 7:18:42 GMT
Chapter 5 Makes No Sense Whatsoever. Mind Explaining It?
Chapter 7 Seems Rather Empty. What Does "Asdf" Mean?
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Post by Qwerty on Jun 2, 2010 13:36:52 GMT
ASDF is obviously code for "He entered the facility and spontaneously combusted".
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Post by necrodoom on Jun 8, 2010 16:22:04 GMT
erm.. chapter 5 makes no sense..
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